Why this blog? Why that blog? Why blog at all? Why are they doing it? Why am I doing it? What are we achieving? Why are we not doing something useful like saving the world? Why are we not... arrrrrrgh!
All these questions began crashing through my head last night after reading a Facebook status from a friend who was elegantly eulogising about the questionable purpose of blogs. His ruminations thrust me into a circle of doubt and indignation. What he was saying did not come across as positive. I wanted to shout and scream and justify myself and my blog. I didn't however. Even though the ideas posed by him were not directed towards me, they did strike a chord, if a somewhat dissonant one. So I slept on it hoping an answer would come.
The morning really does bring a new light to situations. I believe we are all magnificent and creative souls that have no need to prove or justify our creative and artistic actions. To do so makes less of us as humans and feels bad - it happens a lot. It did get me thinking though.
I am not in the least bit ashamed to admit that I am a recovering artist. Once in the not too distant past, I was rigidly blocked by my own fears and insecurities, plagued by the voices of my childhood. They told me things like 'you are not worthy', 'there is no career in the arts', and 'could do better'. My creative expression came out in fits and bursts. One song a year perhaps. One line of verse. Unfinished poems littering my notebooks. Standing, frozen in front of a crowd, playing music but not feeling it or even hearing it for fear of getting it wrong... 'could do better...' The disembodied voice echoed in my brain.
I realise now and thank my friend that his comments about blogs have actually formed a further stage of my artistic recovery. Those doubts and fears reared up again and I was able to move through them into a place of understanding rather than be caught like a rabbit in the headlights of my own, self-limiting vehicle.
You see, creating stuff - art, stories, blogs, dances, music - is such a delicious human activity. Writing, in particular, is something no other animal on the planet does. We are unique in that medium. We are driven to expression and I believe it is our nature. We live and breath as all life does but we also have an innate need to express ourselves and share it. Being human is not a singular pursuit. It is a community thing and in order to function we have to share food, water, air, space, ideas, experiences and art. We are having a relationship with life itself and everything we see is life. It is our right and heritage, as individuals, to step into our creative selves and exercise the freedom to express our perceptions and experiences, free of the demons of ego, limitation, well-meaning opinion, sensibility and moral ethics.
Our ego is so bent on analysing and justifying ourselves and others actions and motivations, we often miss the simple pleasure of enjoying stuff. As I have opened up as an artist, I have found myself wrestling with my ego all the time. I come up with a million excuses and distractions to actually sitting down and creating something. 'See...', it says, 'here is proof that if you create you shall be humiliated', as I read yet another damning review on an artwork. There is a culture of ridicule, criticism and questioning concerning all acts of creativity that gets in the way of simple expression. We are afraid that our meagre offerings will not be high art; that we lack a certain something; that the dreaded 'x-factor' is not present.
I have learned to draw back and let go of that voice but others may not be in such a position yet. To react is to feed the fires of apathy and procrastination. I change my focus, stop listening to the naysayers in my head and in the outer world. In truth, the voices in the outer world are really just echoing the ones in our heads. The ego is desperate to find reasons for things. It is that logical left-brained pursuit of validation and putting things in boxes. If it doesn't fit, then it must be wrong! How many negative patterns have we created in our minds that hinder us from creating real and honest art at any level? Time to let go.
All humans are creative, artistic beings capable of expression on any level, whether it is a masterpiece, a best selling album, a graffiti tag or a twitter tweet. I know because I have been there when a person, adamant they are not creative has tapped into an area of themselves they were not aware of. It is amazing to watch... and it is all valid. We all have the right to be free in our ability to express. We all have the right to create, free from ridicule and ego-based rationale. What does it matter if we do not like something? In a buffet of delicious food, if you don't like olives, you don't carry on eating them. You find a food that you do like. It is the same with the rest of life.
There are myriad reasons for posting blogs, writing songs, dancing down the street, composing poems, lyrics and books. Every fellow human lives in a different world of perceptions, hopes, fears and beliefs. We cannot be sure of everyone's motivations or reasons for creating. Perhaps it is irrelevant. So, let us celebrate and encourage the one common reason for creation that we can be sure of... the need to express our own unique viewpoint. It may not save the world, but maybe freedom of expression is just what the world and humanity needs at the moment.
Our hearts and souls have no need for explanations. They just are. We can drop into our hearts and simply be and enjoy what we see. If we do not like it, we can look for something else we do like. We have that choice. It is that simple. I fulfill my soul yearnings by writing and singing and it makes me happy. When I have not followed my creative urge, I got sad. For me it is that simple. We do what we do because it makes us happy, and in following our bliss, we are able to inspire others to happiness too. So here is to creation. Here is to our creation and our expression of our own unique worlds. I look forward to seeing yours.
Matthew xxx
All these questions began crashing through my head last night after reading a Facebook status from a friend who was elegantly eulogising about the questionable purpose of blogs. His ruminations thrust me into a circle of doubt and indignation. What he was saying did not come across as positive. I wanted to shout and scream and justify myself and my blog. I didn't however. Even though the ideas posed by him were not directed towards me, they did strike a chord, if a somewhat dissonant one. So I slept on it hoping an answer would come.
The morning really does bring a new light to situations. I believe we are all magnificent and creative souls that have no need to prove or justify our creative and artistic actions. To do so makes less of us as humans and feels bad - it happens a lot. It did get me thinking though.
I am not in the least bit ashamed to admit that I am a recovering artist. Once in the not too distant past, I was rigidly blocked by my own fears and insecurities, plagued by the voices of my childhood. They told me things like 'you are not worthy', 'there is no career in the arts', and 'could do better'. My creative expression came out in fits and bursts. One song a year perhaps. One line of verse. Unfinished poems littering my notebooks. Standing, frozen in front of a crowd, playing music but not feeling it or even hearing it for fear of getting it wrong... 'could do better...' The disembodied voice echoed in my brain.
I realise now and thank my friend that his comments about blogs have actually formed a further stage of my artistic recovery. Those doubts and fears reared up again and I was able to move through them into a place of understanding rather than be caught like a rabbit in the headlights of my own, self-limiting vehicle.
You see, creating stuff - art, stories, blogs, dances, music - is such a delicious human activity. Writing, in particular, is something no other animal on the planet does. We are unique in that medium. We are driven to expression and I believe it is our nature. We live and breath as all life does but we also have an innate need to express ourselves and share it. Being human is not a singular pursuit. It is a community thing and in order to function we have to share food, water, air, space, ideas, experiences and art. We are having a relationship with life itself and everything we see is life. It is our right and heritage, as individuals, to step into our creative selves and exercise the freedom to express our perceptions and experiences, free of the demons of ego, limitation, well-meaning opinion, sensibility and moral ethics.
Our ego is so bent on analysing and justifying ourselves and others actions and motivations, we often miss the simple pleasure of enjoying stuff. As I have opened up as an artist, I have found myself wrestling with my ego all the time. I come up with a million excuses and distractions to actually sitting down and creating something. 'See...', it says, 'here is proof that if you create you shall be humiliated', as I read yet another damning review on an artwork. There is a culture of ridicule, criticism and questioning concerning all acts of creativity that gets in the way of simple expression. We are afraid that our meagre offerings will not be high art; that we lack a certain something; that the dreaded 'x-factor' is not present.
I have learned to draw back and let go of that voice but others may not be in such a position yet. To react is to feed the fires of apathy and procrastination. I change my focus, stop listening to the naysayers in my head and in the outer world. In truth, the voices in the outer world are really just echoing the ones in our heads. The ego is desperate to find reasons for things. It is that logical left-brained pursuit of validation and putting things in boxes. If it doesn't fit, then it must be wrong! How many negative patterns have we created in our minds that hinder us from creating real and honest art at any level? Time to let go.
All humans are creative, artistic beings capable of expression on any level, whether it is a masterpiece, a best selling album, a graffiti tag or a twitter tweet. I know because I have been there when a person, adamant they are not creative has tapped into an area of themselves they were not aware of. It is amazing to watch... and it is all valid. We all have the right to be free in our ability to express. We all have the right to create, free from ridicule and ego-based rationale. What does it matter if we do not like something? In a buffet of delicious food, if you don't like olives, you don't carry on eating them. You find a food that you do like. It is the same with the rest of life.
There are myriad reasons for posting blogs, writing songs, dancing down the street, composing poems, lyrics and books. Every fellow human lives in a different world of perceptions, hopes, fears and beliefs. We cannot be sure of everyone's motivations or reasons for creating. Perhaps it is irrelevant. So, let us celebrate and encourage the one common reason for creation that we can be sure of... the need to express our own unique viewpoint. It may not save the world, but maybe freedom of expression is just what the world and humanity needs at the moment.
Our hearts and souls have no need for explanations. They just are. We can drop into our hearts and simply be and enjoy what we see. If we do not like it, we can look for something else we do like. We have that choice. It is that simple. I fulfill my soul yearnings by writing and singing and it makes me happy. When I have not followed my creative urge, I got sad. For me it is that simple. We do what we do because it makes us happy, and in following our bliss, we are able to inspire others to happiness too. So here is to creation. Here is to our creation and our expression of our own unique worlds. I look forward to seeing yours.
Matthew xxx
